I can make lots of excuses and give seemingly valid reasons, but really it all boils down to the fact that over and over again, I think I know best for my life. I take matters into my own hands and disregard what God wants me to do in these situations. From personal experience, this creates a distance between me and my beautiful Saviour. I then begin to feel resentful, guilty, and ultimately unworthy to spend time with Jesus.
A friend recommended I read Beautiful Outlaw by John Elderedge, which has been a thrill (more to come about this). But while I was at the bookstore, I saw this little blue book with plain silver writing on the cover. Very unassuming, but I was still drawn to it. I picked up Come Away My Beloved by Frances J. Roberts and began reading right there in the store. Each section is just about a page long and the words began to melt my heart. I left the bookstore with two books in tow and I couldn’t wait to begin.
I don’t read them every day. I wish I did. I know I should. It’s something I’m working on though. Last night I was reading parts of the Roberts book and I found two entries….Let me just share a couple excerpts:
I Joy over You
“You are many things to Me, just as I am many things to you. My love for you is deep and tender. I know your desire to please Me, and I am happy that it is so. How can I tell you that though I desire holiness, and while I desire fruit in your life, still My love for you is not contingent upon anything you attain?…I love you because you are My child. I love you because I am your Father. i love you with Calvary love. At a great price I redeemed you—becuse I have always loved you. When I planned this, I foresaw you lost in sin; and I loved you, chose you, and set my heart upon you.” (emphasis mine)
Wow! So often my wish to please and be perfect overwhelms me to the point where I fall to the ground and feel like a failure. Here God gently picks me up and cradles me, whispering to me that He still loves me. Nothing I could do would make Him love me less.
You Cannot Weary My Love
“Lift your eyes, and look upon Me. For though you have forgotten Me, I have not forgotten you. While you have busied yourselves with your daily occupations, I have still been occupied with you. When your mind has been captured by the affairs of life, My thoughts have been of you.
My little children, you cannot weary My love. You may grieve My heart, but My love is changeless, infinite. I long for you to turn to Me….I am not a remote power.”
Yet another beautiful truth letting me know that God is still here, waiting for my return with open arms.
God does not see me as unworthy, but rather I am His beloved child whom He will never forget or leave or stop loving.
I couldn’t be more grateful for that truth.